“Here’s the thing, I enjoy all the things that I thought would be boring in sobriety. I thought nightlife was the most fun thing that I could do. I’d go out and drink until three o’clock in the morning and then get up and do it again. I thought that would be my death. But going to the Broad or the Getty Museum with a group of friends is a lot more fun. Finding healthy sober options like the Descanso Gardens in Pasadena and going to concerts–I think the joy that people find in everyday life is always there. You just have to be patient and tune into it. Make your own fun. I do a lot of outdoor stuff. I make a conscious effort to get out into the world because I spent so much time sleeping and recovering from a hangover. People forget that we can do things like jumping out of airplanes, go horseback riding, scuba diving, hiking, skying, surfing—whatever it is that gets you connected to this beautiful world that we used to hibernate from, so that was my take when I got sober. I didn’t want to hibernate anymore.”
—Thomas Clenney, sober since July 4, 2010.
“What I do to keep things juicy is I don’t stick to the basic norms. I switch it up. I get exotic with my lifestyle. I work in nightlife and it’s so taboo to work in nightlife and to be sober, but I do it because I enjoy it. I’m an exotic dancer and host parties in the Hollywood and WeHo area. I enjoy the yin and the yang of it. During the day I take care of myself and hold myself responsible for my sobriety. I go to meetings, I work with newcomers and I’m also a part of the fellowship, but then at nighttime, I have fun with the whole vibe of gritty, dirty, hairy and sweaty fun. It’s not triggering for me, because I always see people who are sober at the parties. It’s one-hundred percent fun… I didn’t get sober and start going to night life right away. I took a year to figure out what was comfortable for me and what was not. After a while, I just found a really comfortable place where I could make it happen.
—Tokeyo Peterson, sober since December 22, 2016.
Who Click With Me
“I stay busy. I look for new things to do that are interesting like pop-up shops. I went to a blacklight slide event over the weekend in Bakersfield—that was kind of cool. One day out of the week we get a group together and go to the movies. Most of the guys are sober, sometimes they’re not. I think it’s all about keeping things fresh and doing new things like going kayaking in Redondo Beach, going to cupcake shops, visiting museums… I surround myself with people who I click with, we have a good time, we check in on each other. Sometimes I don’t want to see the movies they want to see but I go anyway, because it makes them happy and that makes me happy.
—Curtis Hutchinson, sober since December 25, 2007.
From The fight – The Share by Paulo Murillo