ALLOWING MYSELF TO BE HAPPY
“I celebrated 12 years of recovery in 2019. Crystal meth was in my life for 11 years, so I’ve been meth-free longer than my using years, which did not seem possible in early recovery. This past year has been about getting into action. 2019 was also about letting those who wronged me off the hook and in turn allowing myself to be happy. Maybe I didn’t work the perfect program of recovery, but not drinking and drugging is something I did perfectly this past year. I big part of my sobriety is my willingness to be of service to others. I also never forget the chain of events that led to that first step where I admitted I was powerless over drugs and alcohol. Simply put, I stayed clean and sober in 2019. It was a great year. Let’s do it again in 2020.”
—Paulo Murillo, sober since January 10, 2007
WHEN LIFE GOES BAD, I GET INTO ACTION
“The worst thing that happened in my sobriety is that I lost both parents and a brother in a period of six months in 2007. The magic of recovery is by the time my parents died, we had a resolved relationship, but it was very sad. My dad and my brother died three weeks apart, so to be faced with the death of a younger sibling who died of an overdose and not having parents for guidance was very disorienting. I stayed sober through it by getting into action. I borrowed two of my sister’s kids who were young. I had to get out of bed, I had to feed them, and be responsible for them. I did a number of things. I saw a medium. I didn’t know if I believed in him, but I was willing to do anything. I got a new sponsor. I started going to Agape Center to worship with people, and I started going to ALANON. I was inconsolable, so I grabbed every tool I possibly could. The interesting thing about my recovery is that big things like that do not send me out, they keep me in. At no point did I think I should go get drunk or high.”
—Kevin Chase, sober since September 19, 1999.
MIND BOGGLING TO BE SOBER IN 2020
“Turning 19 years sober is mind boggling. I don’t know quite how I’ve done it, other than to have realized that I had no idea how to live life. Things were getting very dangerous. I had to learn to listen to other sober people once I learned to trust them. I used to be very panic-driven. I was very selfish. It involved the hustle. I felt that I needed to take anything I could possibly take, from anyone who crossed my path, or I’d end up with nothing. And of course, I ended up with nothing, anyway (laughs). I didn’t understand what was going on. Today is a lot calmer. It is more rewarding. Now I’m not so concerned about survival. Now I look at how I’m behaving. Am I giving back to my community? Am I a productive member? I look at what I can do for the people around me instead of taking. I reap greater benefits from not thinking about myself and helping other people instead. It’s organic. Things come to me naturally.”
—Sondra Martin, sober since May 20, 2000