Although there are many forms of love — platonic love, romantic love, love for the family or even love for a beloved pet — people underestimate the need for self-love. Look past the inner voice of self-criticism and create a new mantra that embraces you and creates a source of strength and resilience. Let’s review five ways to foster that love of self and overcome negative patterns of self-hate.
1. Get in touch with yourself.
In order to nurture and support those around us, we need a strong foundation of self-love. Taking time to support your well-being is a way to demonstrate to yourself and others that you are important and deserving of love and attention. Take a walk in the park, meditate, and allow yourself to just be. You will be surprised at how the stress of the day can slough off and how you can begin to hear that inner voice of self-love deep within.
2. Start a new record.
People often tell themselves negative things about their appearance, behavior or relationships. Start a gratitude journal and list the things that you appreciate about yourself instead. Perhaps you’ve put on a little weight. Instead of criticizing yourself, thank your body for carrying you through your day. Be thankful for the beauty that resides within you. Write down a loving thought daily, and post a supportive sentiment about yourself by the mirror. As you reflect on yourself, think also on the gifts that you bring to the world.
3. Foster supportive relationships.
Those who truly love you will want you to love yourself. Surround yourself with the support of family and friends who want to assist in your new perspective. Create a community that thrives together and supports the well-being of each member. The company you keep really does make a difference. Being around positive, loving people makes it easier to be positive and loving to yourself.
4. Face challenges.
Every obstacle is another way to overcome and grow. Acknowledge your strengths and develop a better sense of self by facing problems new and old. As you face challenges, even when they are painful, you build a sense of accomplishment. Instead of hating yourself for not being able to do anything, you can love yourself for trying. Rid yourself of fear and negative self-talk. Celebrate new accomplishments as you reflect upon them.
5. Forgive.
Holding on to guilt or the failures of others does little to benefit self-love. These negative thoughts hold us back from a higher focus. Forgive yourself for past failures. You are human, and life doesn’t come with instructions. At some level, these mistakes were a necessary learning tool. Make amends with those affected. Everyone will continue to slip up as they progress through their personal journeys. Most of life is made of small errors, but persistence gets us to our goals. Forgiveness will release you from shame and guilt and make it possible to build a new relationship with yourself or with others.
A sense of self and a love that encompasses oneself is the nucleus of all future connections. Take the time out to be compassionate to the person who needs it most — yourself. We agree with Lucille Ball who once said, “I have an everyday religion that works for me. Love yourself first, and everything else falls into line.”