The holidays seem like a joyous time for most children. However, adult children of alcoholics might realize later that it’s time to learn how to face the past, which may not be perfect, and still enjoy the holidays.
ACA Fellowship Text, Hard Cover edition, was written by anonymous ACA members providing guidance on working the 12 Step ACA program leading to recovery from the effects of growing up in an alcoholic or otherwise dysfunctional family.
Order Adult Children of Alcoholics from My 12 Step Store today. This soft cover edition can be used in facilities where hardcovers are not allowed.
Start to heal with the Adult Children of Alcoholics Workbook from My 12 Step Store. It was made to work in a group setting or individually with a sponsor.
Sometimes Obvious, Sometimes Not
Not all alcoholic parents openly drink or have booze in plain sight. Instead, you might have memories of booze bottles stashed under the sink, in towel drawers, or other places where alcohol normally isn’t found. Whether your parent openly consumes alcoholic beverages in front of you or hides it, it still has an effect on you. But you can move past it. You can learn to not let alcoholic parents ruin the holidays.
Strengthening My Recovery is written by and for the Adult Children of Alcoholics/Dysfunctional Families Fellowship. With 365 daily shares, each paired with a meaningful quotation from the ACA Fellowship Text, this meditation book will inspire its readers.
How To Handle the Effects of Alcoholic Parents
Even if you don’t drink, you possibly have experienced depression and anxiety associated with the instability of alcoholism. For instance, some adult children of parents who misuse alcohol will witness their mom or dad’s inability to get out of bed until after a few cups of coffee. Sometimes, their children have to clean up the vomit afterward and take care of them. If this sounds like your situation, you might need some holiday coping skills.
This Workbook expands the Fellowship Text’s brief description of the “Other” or Opposite Laundry List (BRB, p. 8). It contains concise questions to guide the recovering adult child in reliving actual episodes that produced feelings of inferiority, shame, guilt, and anger (emotional intoxication).
Love This : ACA Loving Parent Guidebook (Spiral )
1. Remember It’s Not Your Problem
It’s easier said than done. However, you have to stop blaming yourself for the reason that your parents are the way they are. No matter what they said to you while angry, you’re not the reason they can’t stop drinking. If one of your parents doesn’t drink, that parent is also not the reason your other one does.
2. Take Care of Yourself
Children of alcoholics tend to take on responsibilities meant for grown people. If you still catch yourself neglecting your own needs to take care of your parents, remember to set boundaries. Take a shower, clean your house, and do your own chores before tending to your loved ones.
When you take care of yourself, it makes you stronger when it comes time to take care of others. Moreover, watch out for the possibility of developing your own addiction as a result of living with people who abuse alcohol.
3. Try Not To Enable Them
This might come as a huge challenge. When you stop giving your parents money — or perhaps stop buying alcohol, cigarettes, lottery tickets, or whatever — they might try to make you feel guilty. Whatever the case may be, set boundaries whenever possible as part of your own recovery.
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Al-Anon and Adult Children of Alcoholic meetings provide excellent resources for people with parents who still actively drink. You also can seek inspiration from My 12 Step Store.